this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
