They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
