Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
