pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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