I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize