i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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