STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
