oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Randomize