Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
