i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Randomize
