He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Randomize
