Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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