ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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