It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize
