I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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