So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Randomize
