Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
