i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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