just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
