One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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