And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Randomize
