woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
There are leaves in my underwear?
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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