Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
