As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Randomize
