There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
