I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize