Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
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