i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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