Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Randomize