We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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