Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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