Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Randomize
