I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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