babies were throwing up all over the place
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
