And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
