You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
