You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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