Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
