It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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