thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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