this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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