I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
