Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
