I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
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