ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
