she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Randomize
