you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize
