I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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