Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
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