if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
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