omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize