Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
